Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
"Ever since I killed her kid she be actin' shady." Actual quote overheard at Marine World just now. Oh God.
my mother just offered to pay for my fake id.
one might say we're banned from that church
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
I'm making celebratory pizza rolls. They're a lot like regular pizza rolls, but without the taste of shame.
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
Your a horrible friend, i only tried to do the right thing by moving you off the floor.. that was not an invitation to puke all over my bed and attempt to use my dog to mop it up.
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
The psychic I saw today told me NOT to text the guy I haven't heard from yet since our first date this weekend b/c it wouldn't go anywhere...Miller light said otherwise. Miller light > Cleo
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
The bad thing is that I bled through my bandages last night and keep finding blood around the house. It's almost like a scavenger hunt for solber me. I get to find out where drunk me went.
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
Randomize
