Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
This guy kept trying to use "see? I'm clean. Cleared by the plasma place today." as a pick up line. This is not okay.
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
If you think eating a bowl of leftover stuffing and drinking champagne from the bottle in dirty sweats at 9am is sexy... Then yeah, I'm your girl.
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
Randomize
