ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
Dan just whipped out his wang to piss in a milk jug! Hello weekend.
You called me twice to tell me that you spit in your own eye, when I was right next to you.
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
I got so drunk I thought my tennis court was a corn field so I laid in it and ate pizza
Dude on a beach in sicily and a blonde jesus just smoked us out and then tried to makeout with me I am never leaving this place
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