i think my mom watched the whole time
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
YOU CAN RENT MIDGETS ON CRAIGS LIST
I told you not to ruin your birthday surprise!
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
pretty sure I just got a "sorry I have a new boyfriend" blow job. Confused, but totally ok with it.
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
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