ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
Sponge bath it is.
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
Using the only finger i can move, i calculated body mass, intake and time. It's mathematically impossible for me to still have this hangover at 9pm. I passed out at 8pm last night. Fuck vodka.
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
I'm a bit broke right now... Would it be OK if I pay you in champagne and Xanax?
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
I just woke up in his bed.. in a cardboard castle, with a Justin Bieber poster on the ceiling staring down at me, cuddling with 4 empty PBR cans. I win.
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
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