i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
Hahah what did you even say to him?!
That I was gonna inflate his vagina with a leaf blower?
Oh.
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
Let it be known that on this day, the 26th of October, in the year 2016, I successfully put both of his balls in my mouth at once.
Turns out, it's impolite to repeatedly request Seal "Kiss From a Rose" at bars
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
Randomize
