You can bone my sister, but I will end our friendship if you write 'LOLERS' one more time at the end of your texts.
the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
Did you hear about Miss Teen Delaware? From the snippet they played on the radio, I knew exactly what porn company it was from. Maybe I should cut back
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
Two of my roommates are waxing their vaginas in the living room. Can I come smoke?
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
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