The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
my brother wants to know why there are wet balloons in his bed and i think you forgot to throw the condoms away but im too hungover to check if thats what hes talking about
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
I want you to read this conversation tomorrow and be proud of the fact that you taught me how to decipher any drunk message. Good job.
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
Forget about letting a 70-year-old man suck on my tits for coke... telling my new boyfriend about it was the poor life choice.
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
I’m photoshopping my boobs to up my Tinder game. I need better dick in 2020
Randomize
