Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
my cup is half full, half full of rum.
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
Is there a reason there's a dick print on my seventh-story window?
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
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