Just come over and take your pants off. 35 mins tops. You'll be home before midnight cinderella
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
But fine, we can play that game. You can come over and we can have totally platonic, long, boring discussions. Or we can fuck. Whatever.
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
So then I got so stoned I sat and took my pulse for 10 minutes.
Randomize
