Grow some girl-balls and come out already
some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
We started making out, then he decided to get naked, put on a condom, and proceed to dry hump my leg, sweat pants and all, until he blew his load. I thought this was college. I immediatly left claiming I can't sleep in other people's rooms. He didn't even bother taking off my hoodie.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
He will. He has no choice. What's he gonna do? Find a better fuck buddy? We both know that's not possible. I'm the ideal friend with benefit. Minus snoring and uneven tits.
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
Dear me: Drinking & crying tonight, my place, 9pm sharp. Love, your life
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
And then I remembered we banged to Beethoven & I was like you will never get this ass again
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
are you inviting me to ice cream?
the subtext of everything i say to you is inviting you to ice cream
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
Randomize
