Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
I judge my drunkenness on my brickbreaker playing skills. I'm winning. Suck it.
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
Bad news is he broke up with me via text message
But the good news is I've returned as mayor of whoreville
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
Meet me at the corner of "what the fuck" and"how'd you get in my bed" in 10 minutes.
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
sometimes i feel like my only option in life is to be drunk or be a cat. today i am drunk
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
Yah. I'm gonna lay you down and feed you grapes, except I'm gonna replace grapes for my balls
Randomize