BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
It was my penance. God came down to me in the form of an angel and said, "you must atone for your sins, by puking in your mouth at church right before communion"
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
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