So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
Friend I haven't seen in almost a year just IMed me to let me know that my mom stuck her boob out the window on the freeway at her.
Her mom responded by mooning my mother. I really don't know what's worse.
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
i may or may not have bought a plane ticket for a russian cam girl to fly here. also, can you spot me $300 on rent?
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
apparently when she asked me how drunk I was on a scale of 1-10, I answered "bitch I'm fabulous" and tried to do a sassy hairflip. but I have short hair.
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
Having a bangable neighbor is going to ruin my booty call game. I refuse to go across town for dick now
Randomize
