he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
They were arguing about who would hit the piñata first so naturally you tore it open with your hands. You broke the piñata and their hearts.
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
There needs to be a greeting card for "I miss having sex and smoking weed with you."
I told her we had to stay at the bar until at least midnight because that's when my direct deposit hit, don't tell me i'm not responsible
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
Randomize
