guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
Did I get blown in the bathroom? Yes. Did she throw up cranberry juice on my shorts? Yes. Did she finish the job? Yes.
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
After the clumsiest day of my life I think it's safe to say my dream of being a ninja is dead. Memorial service with a glass of wine at 8pm
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
You called me last night and said you had a vision that a cat made you a sandwich. You were tripping way too hard
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
All I remember is your girlfriend laying on the bathroom floor and me crawling in and asking if it was okay to puke.
Randomize
