road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
Omg. In the pub, there's a guy shouting at the olympic channel 'yeah! Kill that motherfucker!' we're watching figure skating.
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
Out of ice. Vodka+club soda+cut up lime popscicle=I'm an alcoholic genius.
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
I tripped over a vacuum cleaner and fell into a beer pyramid
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
Randomize
