okay pat passed out under dana's car
She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
what the fuck were we smoking when we had a conversation about how my brother would be so proud if i fucked an orange alien?!?
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
When Pitbull's songs sum up your life... you know it's time for some serious life changes.
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
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