my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
The pregnant Hooters waitress told me to "make good choices".
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
How do I politely say my vagina is not a chew toy and if you bite me again I will slap you?
You could say take it easy, whoa there, be gentle, anything that doesn't fully convey the horror.
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
Randomize
