Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
Come back. She's looking through naked pics of his exes on his phone and questioning him about them and I'm too drunk to walk away.
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
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