You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
I tried to give up sex for lent. It feels weird that on easter I'm this excited to be a whore again
Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
Um don't talk to me about fat. I just used my chip bag to cover up all my candy wrappers in the garbage.
i realized our last day of finals is on cinco de mayo....it's god's way of saying drink ridiculous amounts of tequila and wear sombreros
I may have pooped in your shoe. or somewhere else in your closet. its unclear.
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
It's probably not a good thing when it isn't even 6:30 and I've already drank an entire bottle of wine. By myself. I'm watching Spice World and I just bought 2 Spice Girls albums off itunes.
Make that 3 Spice Girls albums.
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
Randomize