she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
hey, do you know how many packets of jello it takes to turn a handle of vodka into slutty girls?
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
Yes I hit her with my car. Yes I gave her a ride home. And yes she gave me her number. What's the problem?
Dude, you left ME alone in your house. With your fully-stocked wine cellar. Why would you do that to yourself?
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
He’s like Batman if Batman went down on me and gave me multiple toe curling orgasms. He left without saying a word before I pulled the pillow off my face
Find out if he’s shared his techniques with a friend and set me up with him. You know I’ve always had a thing for Robin!!!!
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