I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
you puked on the porch, i can see your jacket on the floor next to your underwear. i know your home, unchain the door, you're the worst roommate ever.
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
No don't worry! What are obnoxious, alcoholic, slut roommates for if not for uplifting words and tales of my folly?!
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
Look, his dick is so good at being a dick that it makes me see God. And I don't even believe in God.
PANTIES FOUND
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