My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
vagina is talking i cant
I was talking to this girl who was in love with the air force. I was doing decently until I mentioned that the navy actually has more planes. Cockblocked by my knowledge of random trivia again.
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
I apologize that you just fell victim to my random thought of how to make a blow job come to life via emojis.
I'll have a whole suitcase of emergency bacon with me obviously
Yeah but the jokes on her right? We just got a new couch and hers still has a cum stain on it from like six months ago
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
Randomize
