Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
His ankle bracelet only gets in the way when I'm trying to take off his pants.
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
I said to him "i can't have sex with anyone in my friend's living room" then he said "we can move the air mattress into the kitchen"
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
Showed up physical therapy hammered. The therapist just says this isnt part of the program.
It's like fucking tetris in this bed
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
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