Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
kyle and i were puking, simultaneously, off the front porch at 4 am, and in the middle of it he looks up, reaches his hand over, and says "knucks." And then I proceeded to fist bump him. By farrr the best time I've ever had puking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
My roommate just woke up to me masturbating in our room. I figured this would happen eventually.
Randomize