I don't think brook has ever known best
Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
Keanu Reeves Photobombed A Couple’s Wedding Photos As A Perfect Gift
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
The bartender gave me a roll of masking tape so I could tape my heels to my feet so I wouldn't lose them when i went drunk running later that night
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
Just used the leftover candycorn for candycorn vodka. Our house is trying to continue the Halloween spirit for as long as possible.
29 Married People Share What They Used To Find Cute About Their SO—But Now Find Infuriating
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
Just to be a PITA after I die, my will leaves 1 cent to each of my FB friends. I hate my lawyer.
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
This friendship isnt goin to work if you dont respond to my drunk texts
i just went to hell in the tanning bed. i think god is giving me a preview of what is in store if i keep getting drunk everyday.