i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
oh vodka. i could write you a sonnet.
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
i think im the only person who makes thank you cards for their drug dealer
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
there is nothing like a happy birthday present when you wake up with a bow on your vagina.
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
according to the calendar even that i put in my phone last night, i'm supposed to fuck shit up at 11am today... i really hope i didn't miss something important
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