i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
So that wine I told you about is vile...
That the stuff you brewed in your dorm closet? Are you actually going to drink it?
Yup. It's drinkable. Might go blind, but I've got to use my chemistry minor for something.
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
Hey kevin, it's Ashlee. I have been trying to get ahold of you. Your pledge gave me your number. I really wanted to apologize for shitting in your car I'll buy new upholstery or pay to have it shampooed if needed. I'm so embarrassed.
that's the second time my extensive knowledge of taylor swift has gotten me laid
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
Randomize