the fundamentals of my vasectemy are strong
So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
Dude you make losing your phone an art. You left it balancing on a two liter bottle in the kitchen. Wtf
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
Randomize
