there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
what kind of dress can i wear to my high school reunion that says "even though i'm more successful than all of you i'm still up for sex"?
I told him he didn't want "flip-flop extraction" on his medical history.
If i ever have a kid with an outie i'm giving it up for adoption
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
A giant panda just asked me for a cigarette and said "man pandas gotta smoke too." There is something wrong with this place.
We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
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