I'm at his house. He has VELCRO shoes. I'm too desperate to leave...I may need help in thee life dept
id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
I went to the gynecologist and they said, "you're the most fun person we've ever had," and i thought, "that's exactly why i'm here!"
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
He tried to say "god bless your heart" to the stripper but it came out "god bless your pussy"
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
I have a feeling that watching gay porn with you was the reason I was dancing in a hurricane of floating dicks in my dream last night.
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
Randomize
