im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
i told him to take shots to cure a hangover and he told me i was "walking the steppingstones to alcoholism"
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
Did I just hear you ask Siri about the meaning of life?
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
THANKS BE TO BLACK BABY JESUS IN HIS LITTLE GOLDEN DIAPER FOR BLESSING ME WITH NOT PREGNANT
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
Randomize