Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
Thanks for feeding me more tequila shots to prevent me from trying to fight her last night. Horrible logic? Yes, but you are the best friend ever
He's coming over tonight...I really wish I didn't have my period right now...
I believe I'm witnessing the first time ever that you wished your period would NOT come....
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
So you think Jesus would be proud of me for walking of shame into my apartment 10 minutes before I told my parents I'd be over for Easter?
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
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