Her hair smelled like a rat dipped in mustard on fire
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
I just watched the lion king for the first time in years. It's like the equivalent of a really good blow job.
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
Just found out my rents have been paying my siblings to cockblock me for the past 5 years
Not as covert as you thought huh?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
So on a scale from 1-10 how gross is it that I used mortuary makeup on my own face?
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
If you come home to me in lingerie and you start vacuuming...I need to reevaluate my priorities
I woke up an hour ago with orange fingers and a condom stuck to my head.. Wtf just happened?
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