Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
Definition of cool: he wants a back tattoo of three horses running through a "paisley explosion"
How did he even become this person? Like what drugs has he done??
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
It's one PM on a Saturday and I'm sitting here drinking Jack, eating a block of cheese and playing Minecraft. Please tell me you can come drag me to a bar.
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
Randomize
