Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
he was CRYING into my vagina
Have you ever seen a midget fist pump? BEST. THING. EVERRRRR.
Just had a handjob preempted by a huge bolt of static electricity leaping from her fingertip to my sack. I hate this time of year.
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
At some point the phrase "I've hit rock bottom" stopped having a meaning and became my general state of life
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
I don't know who's idea it was to get wine for a frat party but my poor pitiful hung over self really fucking hates them.
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