it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
Things on my life to do list: hold a pound of marijuana. Check.
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
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if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
Vodka tonic time....wish me luck!
Go for it my man. I'm saving my shit show night for tomorrow. Gonna make it a big one just to let the entire bar know why I'm single
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Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
i just woke with half a bagel saran wrapped to my phone and a cookie in an envelope beside my head...
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
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