she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
And the cops told us we were all naked.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
2pm: Breaking news alert: I think I'm finally sober. Oh, and that place needs hotter strippers.
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
I just heard a 350 lb guy with a stutter describe getting blood in his eye as he was shanking his cellmate and, more generally, how to survive as a white guy in jail.\n\nYou should really consider going to some AA meetings
You know it's nice having a girlfriend who will lotion your balls for you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
And I made some girl take out the trash, load and unload the dishwasher, swifter, and clean the counters. So don't act like I don't do anything.
Just got a snapchat from him that was a video of with the caption "my new apartment" in Brazil. I think we might not be seeing eachother anymore.
Can you have a quarter life crisis another time? I'm trying to masterbate.
Well, after a pitcher of beer, I set my ex on fire. It was a little fire, he's fine. How's your night?
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