It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
found a strand of your hair in my car. it's 1 ft 7 inches long
wtf you measured my hair?
your ex dropped by. you can call me dwight howard, cuz im the king of rebounds
i swear i just saw perry the platypus. the fuck dude. i shouldnt even know who that is
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
Sexting Captain while emailing my eharmony match about my low key weekend is hard.
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
My dream date: Hotdogs/nachos from the bar & tequila. Is that too much to ask?
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
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