you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
I'm retiring my vagina. Better yet I'm Farve-ing it.
Def the best call fo sho
That way it can come out of retirement anytime and play for different teams. And it can wear Wranglers.
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
I just realized now that you're pregnant we can't use alcohol as currency
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
Sorry I told all the other bridesmaids you were an asshole. I had had a few drinks and it's how I felt at the time.
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
Randomize
