Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
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My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
I cant help but love a girl who informs me of the pregnancy test results by emailing me a YouTube clip of Barney Stinsons not a fathers day speech.
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
I'm sober. Being kissed by a chick with a llama puppet. Shoot me now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
The majority of the reason I want to get my pilot's license is so I can use the argument "FUCK YOU! I'M A PILOT!"
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
Also you know what's irritating? When the guy you're sleeping with refuses to like any of your Instagram posts
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
Randomize