In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday.
You insisted we help some homeless guy put up posters for his missing pet alligator so we left you there because they were really just Chinese takeout menus.
He's laying next to me passed out dressed as a hooters girl
I bet he's a super pretty hooters girl
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
Randomize
