Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
where am i from again
I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.
I just tried to brush my hair with a can opener. Who gave you that brownie
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
90% sure I just opened a snapchat of you in a fuzzy bathrobe next to your ceiling collapsing
Randomize