I think I have swimmer's ear. From his tongue.
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
I apologize for violently hooking up with her in front of you in the jacuzzi last night.
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
Only you could go on vacation to visit family and hook up with a pro NFL player from Tinder
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize
