when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
Just got kicked in the balls by a girl in tap shoes. Fuck EVERYTHING
then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
Church boner. Awkwardddd
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
A girl pulled up next to me at a stoplight just now, looked around for a second, and then changed her top, bra and all, before the light turned green. New. Hero.
When did we convert life to cartoon?
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
Welp. June's off to a great start. I just ripped my pants, completely sober, at 10:30 p.m.
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
Alcohol and I aren't friends right now.
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
Randomize
