the bitch is dead man
YOUR DOG DIED?
no i meant my mom has passed out .. so i'll be over soon.
Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
Come home. Im drunk and cutting my own hair. This is bad, i need you.
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
I just got carded by a ten year old.
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
Woman doing my Brazilian right now says to tell you she says hi...what has our life come to?
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
Randomize
