Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
i woke up today to a handjob from this really fat girl that keeps calling me michael phelps
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
quitting drinking is the number 5 new years resolution but number 4 is enjoying life more which one do you think im going to pick
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
It was like getting a handjob from a frost giant
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
I thought I'd never say this, but if I had to choose between these cookies and sex, it would be these cookies
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
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