Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
I'm trying real hard to keep it on the DL how drunk I am at lunch with my grandma.
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
What kind of true American would I be if I didn't just smoke weed in my bathrobe on my back porch in the middle of suburbia on 4/20? #stepmomoftheyear
Randomize
