Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
I wish i had a shirt that said, "I know what you're thinking and it's not herpes on my face"
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't decide who is the bigger alcoholic: you for opening that bottle of wine just now or me for hearing it in the other room over the air conditioner
i officially have over $300 in my bank account. that's a year's worth of chipotle.
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mom legitimately hired a private eye on me. DO YOU KNOW HOW EXCITING MY LIFE JUST GOT???
I haven't taken a solid shit in four weeks. Do you know what started four weeks ago? Alcohol and dining hall food. Fucking college.
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
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