do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
You blackout rapped the entire DMX song Party Up last night at karaoke without looking at the screen. Then you Tebowed on stage, hugged a black guy, puked in a garbage can, then left. You deserve a medal.
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
Randomize
