My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
my being single is dangerous.
I asked her if she wanted to make this a permanent exclusive thing instead of a fuck buddy thing, and she just looked at me like I'm an idiot.
That's because you are an idiot.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
He also ordered me a vibrator last week, so the flowers kind of balance it out
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
Randomize
