I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
Don't park in the garage. I installed a stripper pole while drunk and it's kinda in the way
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
“before I show up tits a blazing, what’s the sexual temperature here?“
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
Randomize