Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
How do I say "I want to suck your balls" in a classy but sexy way,
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
Randomize
